The Thirty Minute Blogger

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Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Getting Past the Fear of the New

Moving into new adventures, new ways of life, new jobs, new careers, new relationships, new, new, new ... can scare us half to death. There are times when people will stick to an old situation simply because it is familiar. Even when that situation is making them miserable. Why? Simple fear. Fear of change which boils down at its most elemental to fear of the unknown. When we can't see what's coming next we get very uncomfortable.

Horror movies are based on this premise. So many great horror films have people wandering in the dark ... not knowing when or if the terrible something is going to jump out of the dark to get them. The best horror movies keep the horrible something unseen for as long as possible, making it all the more terrifying because even its form is unknown. 

We want to retreat from that horrible, uncomfortable fear. In doing so, we often deny ourselves the joy of the new for the security of the known. I recently went through this experience transferring from my previous career into a new career. There were all sorts of terrors before the first day on the new job. All sorts of fears that were nearly crippling when it was late and I was tired. But, I pushed ahead and discovered the great joy that awaited in that new situation ... along with the uncertainty about what comes next ... that tempered that insecurity. Now, two days into the new career, things are settling into a pattern and a pace. I'll be feeling my way for a while, but enough normal, familiar stuff has occurred to make things feel right and to dampen those fears. 

When facing the new, especially the new that makes sense for your life, fight to hold those fears at bay. Work one step at a time to forge ahead in the new. Before long, once you get past the initial fear, the new becomes the new normal ... and all is well once again. Better yet, you're stronger for facing those fears and living them down. You've been tempered and are better equipped to face whatever the future might hold. Hang in there. It's hard getting through the worst of it. Have someone with you whom you can confide in. That helps a great deal. My wife listened to a lot of fears for a little while and shouldered them well. She was a true blessing and helped me master those fears. 

Whatever you do, don't give into those fears and turn away from that good change in your life. Don't give fear an opportunity to grow strong in your life. You weren't made for that.

You can do it too. Good luck!

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